How to Torture a Devout Male Muslim

Yahoo! News - A FEW MUSINGS ABOUT VALENTINE'S DAY:
Smack dab in this banal ramble about feminism and Valentine's Day- a shocker:

"Hold your moral outrage: These female officers would sidle up against the mostly Arab men, half strip in front of them and then -- hold your breath -- pretend to be taking menstrual blood from under their own pants before smearing it on the horrified men's bodies. That way, the prisoners would be 'unclean' in Muslim terms for prayer."

I don't care what deity you pray to, our what country you are "protecting"; attacking your prisoners' faith in such a maniacally evil, calculated way is beyond the pale.

And these are our closest allies and trading partners? Are 3000 dead from 9/11 really a justification to betray your humanity like this? And the Pentagon is going to try to pin it on the two female officers who allegedly performed said torture (I mean, really, let's stop burying our collective heads in the sand and call it what it is, torture):

The newspaper quoted Defense Department officials as saying two female interrogators have been reprimanded for such tactics.

It's not likely these two were sitting around one day having a conversation like this:

Female Officer #1: How was your leave?

Female Officer #2: Pretty good, relaxing. Watched a lot of TV with the hubby.

Female Officer #1: Ahhh- I miss my TiVo...

Female Officer #2:-and I saw this amazing show on PBS-

Female Officer #1: Hahaha...PBS!!!

Female Officer #2: -no, really! It was all about the rise of Islam and about their cultural and religious beliefs and systems. It got me thinking about all these guys we have in "The Pen"...

Female Officer #1: Yeah- like how they are all freaks against God!

Female Officer #2: Naw, more useful- they have all these hang-ups about women, about touching us, about us "touching" them, and about menstrual blood and praying...

Female Officer #1: -yeah, the praying thing freaks me out daily. All of them pointing the same way in the yard, even after we put the hoods on 'em and spin 'em around...

Female Officer #2: Yeah, totally, but if we put our menstrual blood on them (or pretend to) then they will be "unclean" before Allah and won't want to pray for fear of being struck down or something--- I was pretty tired towards the end, but that's the idea I got.



Female Officer #1: Wow, who would have thought PBS could be so interesting! Let's get some pigs blood from the mess and try this out tonight. All that chanting gives me the willies.

Female Officer #2: Yeah- but don't you think we should run this by that CIA guy at least to see if this would be helpful? To see if it fits in the guidelines... I mean, it's not like we're gonna hook their balls up to a car battery or anything, but you never know...

Female Officer #1: That CIA guy is pretty hot- all mysterious, and stuff- and everyone just calling him Agent Brown all the time. It gets my panties wet just---naw- let's surprise him. Bring your camera- we'll show him the pictures later. It shows initiative...we might even get promotions out of it!

Female Officer #2: Yeah...you're right! I wanna put on some "provocative" panties, too.

Female Officer #1: To really rile up the prisoners?

Female Officer #2: No, silly! For Agent Brown! If he's gonna see these photos, I wanna look HOT!

Both: (Giggles)

--dear God, I hope it didn't happen like that. Not at all.